“Spice Things up in Your Relationship by Ruining Your Man’s Day” – Toke Makinwa

So, popular Media Personality, Toke Makinwa took to her social media handle and served some relationship advice which centered on her ‘crazy side because she is a scorpio‘.

The media personality described herself as someone who will pick up a fight with her man for no reason. She however added that she takes off the heat by sending a raunchy photo, which according to her works the whole time. Toke ended up telling ladies to try it out some time because life is boring.

Seriously, the advice got me thinking really hard. Like why would you suddenly pick up a fight with your man all in the name of trying to spice up the relationship?  Like who doesn’t enjoy having a peaceful relationship? Does fighting with someone and giving them unnecessary headache equate loving them?

I read a tweet one time. It said, “Healthy relationships feel boring to people who are used to relationships filled with toxicity and drama. They are not sure what to do with love that is calm, kind, drama free and non-toxic”. And that’s really true. Most times, when we step out of a toxic relationship where you are always on logger-heads with your partner and you enter a calm relationship where your partner loves the hell out of you and gives you peace of mind; you start feeling bored. Why? Because your mind has been programmed to believe that a relationship cannot thrive without fight.

Funny thing is, the problem is always with us ladies. I get the fact that we love attention and pampering a lot and most times we throws unnecessary tantrums to get our man’s attention; I dot it a lot actually. But we should be careful to know when to do all these; and we should try not to go over the board with the unnecessary tantrums because “Peace of Mind” is what every man craves for in a lady.

In fact, that is what we all want when with a person. Peace. Peace at home. No fights, no frustrations, no stress. Men avoid complicated and draining environments. There is this quote that says, “Give him what the streets can’t – positivity and a peace of mind”.

Like your man is working his ass off to make ends meet; he has a demanding job and runs a business by the side. He is trying to stay sane with all the pressures he is receiving. What in the name of love makes you think he needs further headache from someone he calls ‘Home’?

Sometimes you have no clue the fight your man is fighting. Most times, he comes back home exhausted and he just wants to relax but you won’t let him do that. After a hard day a work, you also could use some quiet time to relax and have a good conversation with your partner. So, why bring up silly arguments about little things?

There is no doubt that in relationships there are fights and bitter disagreements, but can we fight for something that’s really worth fighting for? Can we please not fight over stupid stuff like why one lady is always commenting on his Facebook posts?

Ladies, let us be properly guided. Relationships can thrive without our unnecessary drama. You might as well get a life. Because I am sure, when you are really busy you wouldn’t have the time to pick unnecessary fights with your man.

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