641 views | Sarafina Ann Nneoha | September 28, 2019
There was this guy I was dating months back. We were residing in the same city but it was always a big deal for us to see. I mean, if I didn’t call him and asked if we can hang out, he would never call. His excuse was, “I don’t know how to make plans”, or “I am busy with work”. And I would believe him hook, line and sinker. This continued till it got to a point where it became exhausting. I was always the one making plans, 80% of the time, I was the one calling. It was more like I was the one pushing the relationship, trying to make it work.
It took me a while to realize that, “Nobody you are dating is ever “too busy” to see or even talk to you. Even if he or she happens to be the busiest person you know”. We have to stop trying to convince ourselves otherwise, stop trying to make excuses for them.
The bitter truth is, you don’t matter to them and that’s why they are not making any reasonable efforts to keep in touch with you. Seriously, just think about it, you are never too busy for the things or people that are most important to you. If you want to see someone, you make sacrifices in other areas of your life. It could be getting a few hours less sleep, or working all night to have the next day if you have to. And funny enough, none of that even feels like a sacrifice.
When you are in love with someone, you are always going to make sure that you make the time for them. You aren’t going to consider it a burden or a chore to plan dates with them. You won’t act like you’re too busy to respond to a text message from them. You would never make that person feel like it would be too much of a hassle to accommodate them into your life. Because that’s what love is – it’s about making sure that the person you love knows just how much you value and treasure them.
That’s why, if you’ve been dealing with unanswered text messages, coupled with an “I’m so busy” line, odds are that the other person is too busy – for you.
Aside from being “too busy,” below are some of the common excuses:
“I am not good at texting.”
“Work is so crazy.”
“My phone wasn’t working.”
“I’m so tired lately.”
Sure I know life can be crazy and there are times when schedules can just be too tight but that does not mean you disappear altogether if you are into someone. If someone matters to you and is your priority, you will always find a way to make things work.
When it comes to calling or texting back, you will find a way to make it happen, even if it means multitasking or sneaking off to the restroom during office hours. After all, we always find a way to answer texts from our mom or boss.
Good relationships value open communication and how can you achieve that if you are not constantly talking to your partner. It doesn’t have to be a long phone call. It could be a simple SMS, a quick phone call or even just a private message on social media – anything that would let the other party know that they are in your thoughts.
We should all be with someone who values time. Time is the most precious commodity that we have on earth. And we should know when to break up something that is no longer working out. It’s a lesson I learnt the hard way.