“It’s unacceptable to have feelings for her”

381 views | Stanley Ugagbe | April 17, 2021

The ministry of ‘feelings’ is unarguably one of the most dramatic life’s events and sometimes, the parties involved may not be able to unravel the mystery behind the cruise. You may want to grab some popcorn – let’s caress our minds with another evolving development in a subtle way.

A few days ago, I was romancing one of my favorite Nollywood movies, “Don’t Fight It” perhaps, for the 7th time and the necessity came for me to tailor this riveting read.  In the 2hrs, 17minutes long movie, a certain Chuma, due to situations of life (perhaps, his destiny) found himself sheltered by a certain Cherry, daughter of a senator. Expectedly, (due to the predictability of Nollywood movies), Cherry started having feelings for Chuma. Disturbed by the lingering feelings, Cherry intimated her elderly cousin, a certain Benson who was also living in the house – they were three living in the house! In response to Cherry’s remarks about having feelings for Chuma, Benson said “it’s unacceptable for her to have feelings for Chuma, that he is a commoner, a son of a nobody and that they picked him from the gutters”. Chuma had dropped out of school after his sponsor, his uncle’s business dwindled – he had lost his parents earlier on.

Benson’s reaction to Cherry’s feelings stunned me. But then, the movie is a replica of what is obtainable in the present day society.

The society has conditioned ‘feelings’ to identify class. So before you can catch feelings for anybody, you have to ask yourself, are we of the same class? If no, you have to perish the idea of ever having feelings for the intended person. This simply explains the circular marriages happening among Nigerian politicians.

Before now, feelings don’t identify class, status, age, or even background. But the norm has now become that before you even conceive the idea, you have to do background check if the person is in your social status.

The most crucial question people used to ask before committing to relationships and marriages was “is he/she of good character?” But today, the most crucial question is does s/he have money? Are they rich in their family?

Alas! I am worried about the growing moral decadence – oh! The society is now littered with people that are morally bankrupt, hence; iberisberistic iberiberism is highly on the increase.

I am not sure of the genesis of this ill development but how and why man has lost the humanity in him is a conundrum that this piece may not be able to provide answers to.

While it is true that money is the oil that lubricates marriages, reality has shown that it’s not enough to hold a relationship or marriage. If it were so, the marriages of the World’s richest man, Jeff Bezos, Africa’s richest man, Aliko Dangote would have been the most successful ones but sadly, their marriages crashed.

Sir/Ma, irrespective of your status, achievement, or wealth, YOU’RE NOT MORE HUMAN THAN OTHER HUMANS – na one penis/vagina you still get. Nobody becomes more special than others before God because he/she is rich. Of a truth, feelings don’t respect status or achievements. Stop talking down on people, halt looking down on people, desist from every ‘iberiberistic iberiberism’. You are first a human before you are anything else. Let the humanity in you drive you!

ugagbestanley@gmail.com, 08137144834

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