“I told you to call her name three times before burying the charm”

Stanley Ugagbe

 

 

Ordinarily, I had proposed in my mind to take a break from this subject and focus on more salient and pressing issues especially on the lingering iberiberistic iberiberisms rocking our endowed nation – but I am under necessity to harp on this discourse, once again!

A few days ago, I was stealing glances at a particular Nollywood movie and due to the peculiarity of the storyline; my attention was completely nabbed for some minutes. A certain young man fell in love with the ‘portrayed most beautiful and expensive’ (I personally do not see anyone as more expensive than others – na one penis/vagina everybody get) lady in the community.

Expectedly, the young man began to devise different means to win the lady’s love – showering her with gifts, spending time with her, showing her how much he loves and wants to be with her – both in words and in actions. Unfortunately for him, the lady wasn’t moved by neither his love confessions nor his actions.

Determined to get the lady either by ‘hook or by crook,’ the young man went to a native doctor (babalawo) to give him a charm that would hypnotize the lady into loving him uncontrollably. He was given certain instructions on how to bury the charm. Things went sour when the lady’s mother began to profess an undying love for him and it was at that moment he knew something was amiss. Upon confronting the herbalist, among other things, he said ‘I told you to call her name three times before burying the charm’. NOW, I WANT US TO PUT THIS IN PERSPECTIVE!

Reality is that genuine love can push people into doing things that they would never have envisaged in their wildest imagination. A lady/dude in love can defy all odds to want to be with the other person – they can do the unthinkable, they can sacrifice their all at the altar of love – and as matter of fact, God demonstrated the most passionate kind of love when He sacrificed His only begotten son for a people that He regretted to have created.

But then, in a bid to make someone to love you, be yours, hypnotizing them into loving you is a catastrophic move. In as much as you want them to be with you, in as much as you want to prove how much you can do for the person, in as much as your intentions are genuine, relationship/friendship/marriage etc are not a do or die affair and there is out rightly no reason to hypnotize people into your life.

As far as relationships are concerned, what makes people special to you is because of the love you have for them – the moment the love wears off your eyes, you would realize that they are as ordinary as every other person you see and know!

And then again, there is a very thin line between love and hate. The fellow who loves you with all their might this minute can hate you with all their breath the next minute depending on how events unfold – if you hypnotize people into loving you and it eventually fades, you would be sure that such people will hate you with everything in them.

And even those that are married, things are beginning to sour and the best thing you can do to keep your marriage is running to a native doctor to help you tie your spouse down – this is such a dangerous thing to do “Is it because there’s no God in Israel that you have decided to run to Beelzebub the god of Ekron?” This was the question that Elijah asked King Ahaziah – the end result was death.

It’s okay to want to prove how much you love someone, it’s okay to make sacrifices for them, it’s okay to make someone see reasons with you on why they should be with you, it’s okay to want to do every right thing to keep your relationship/marriage, it’s okay to go the extra mile to win someone’s love; BUT, relationship/friendship/marriage are not a do or die affair. Never hypnotize anyone into loving you – there are still many fishes in the sea and like I mentioned above, na one penis/vagina everybody get!

ugagbestanley@gmail.com

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