How We Got so Confused: The effects of Modernism on Marriage and Family Life

The Moroccan footballer, Achraf Hakimi and his Spanish wife, Hiba Abouk are on the verge of separation after Hakimi was accused of raping a 24-year-old lady in his home in Boulogne, Paris, on February 25.  Following this alleged report of Hakimi’s sexual misdemeanour, Hiba took a legal step and filed for a divorce from her husband, demanding more than half of his properties. She, however, was taken aback when it was discovered that her husband’s net worth on paper was zero and the court confirmed that all of Hakimi’s assets were acquired in his mother’s name. These events which surrounded the imminent divorce of Achraf Hakimi and Hiba Abouk have taken the internet by storm and different reactions have followed ever since.

Hiba Abouk forced to give half of her assets to Achraf Hakimi

The divorce becomes trending news because of a surprising tone of naming all his assets in his mother’s name as a benefactor, resulting in frustration on the part of his wife’s efforts to claim 50% of their estate. Meanwhile, Hiba Abouk, the wife of Achraf Hakimi is a professional actress. She has her own money hence she never cared about Hakimi sending all his money to his mother while she uses hers to run the home. In fact, in 2020, Sportsmob called Hiba one of the richest Spanish actresses. Hiba has reportedly been asked to give half of her property to Hakimi as the player’s net worth is much lower than hers on paper. The actress’s net worth has been calculated to be around $2 million. She would have had to give half of this to Hakimi while also covering his legal fees. The move has received a divided response from fans as some believe that this is a masterstroke by Hakimi. The soccer player is estimated to be worth around $17 million but all of it is owned by his mother.

Hakimi’s Case: A Modern Bane of Commitment

It is important to state here that practices of sharing from one place to the other because it is pegged on a matrimonial property system. And sharing too depends on the particular type of system the parties chose when they were embarking on the marriage. Alimony, a financial support, which is common in the North America was usually ordered by the court to be given to the female spouse for the care of the children by the male partner after a divorce is granted. The alimony principle is justice driven. In the case of Hakimi, justice and fairness demand that Hiba be supported because she has to cater for two children which are the fruits of the union; let alone forcefully ordered to yet support Hakimi because papers prove Hakimi broke. Subsequently, men who try to be smart like Hakimi may not be lucky, as potential wives will most certainly begin to poke their noses, with audacious scrutiny, into the process and procedure of acquirement of the wealth of their future husbands.

All said many had referred to Hakimi as only a boy who gives his money to his mother to hide it from his wife and also exposes his level of maturity. Many had claimed that real men don’t give their mothers money to keep away from their partners. They said: “We give our spouses the right to our wealth and if they ever ask for a divorce, we give them a reasonable portion of the wealth we built together, say goodbye and continue to be friends for the sake of the kids.”

Needless to affirm that a lot of lies amidst truth and a bit of truth amidst lies prevail in our modern time. Nonetheless, the Catholic Church in her wisdom, possessing the fullness of truth has made provision for a proper orientation of intending couples in the marriage course. With proper teaching, assimilation and practice on issues bothering finance, couples should find a leeway to surmount financial matters alongside other rights and privileges to possessions.

Ultimately, there are salient points to raise about some of these destructive philosophies of our time. In the words of Pope St. John Paul II, our time is a moment of the reign of instrumental reason which has its ends in enjoyment and power, ultimately the love of self without attention to other’s situation and this, marks the beginning of the end of definitive commitment because everything is fleeting and provisional for the modern self.

Rescuing Marriage and Family from the Crises of Modernism

Conversely, there is no doubt that Hiba demonstrated a modicum of impatience and neglected permanence as an element of marriage. Nothing stops her from staying with her spouse at such a trying moment, whether he is supposedly guilty or not. But her attitude could be tagged as that of impatience and disservice to the promise of marriage. It will suffice to conclude, hence, that these two are neither our heroes nor even if many modern ‘smart’ minds celebrate them. We must reemphasize that, though there is no perfect family. Spousal bond, commitment to love and self-giving is not an option in any relationship either in health or sickness, joy or sorrow, or in allegations or no allegation and accusation or no accusations. At the exchange of consent, both parties become one and thereby embrace two properties of marriage which are unity and indissolubility.

Hence, intending or married couples should never be carried away or indoctrinated by false practices celebrated in the modern world especially those against marriage and family life. Beware of false teachings. Marriage is a covenant made by two; a man and a woman before God. Nothing should break this covenant; not even any of the couple. Care must be taken, therefore, that though many of these widely celebrated mentalities about marriage and family life may vindicate the two couples in question, the truth remains that both have shown a seeming dearth of definitive commitment in our modern world where legalism, nihilism, relativism and individualism has become the new world order. Consequently, we are becoming less and less humane as the days pass by.


The writer can be reached via: Adeleke Oluwaseyi James;


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