Author: Ayodele Suyi

If I were President Bola Ahmed Tinubu, I would choose to answer the name of the sixth child of the Tortoise. According to the folklore, after the first five children had been dismissed as failures for the names they adopted, the sixth cradle, when asked which name, he would answer, says: “E maa pe mi ni Afi-oro-oloro-se-arikogbon – call me He-who-learns-from-another-person’s-experience. While he may not have forgotten anything Buhari did or did not do, it is also clear that Tinubu has not learnt anything from what Buhari did or did not do. Are we really sure that he is also…

Read More

There was a man called Ofinaboorun. That is a deep Ekiti name. Meanings are lost in interpretations. So, you may not get the real meaning of the name here. But this interpretation should be enough. Ofinaboorun simply means he who spreads across the road like soldier ants. The legend surrounding the old man indicates that Ofinaboorun was not his real name. It was an appellation, which he got because of what he did to protect his community from bandits from a neighbouring community. Here is what he did. Information filtered in that the warring community was about to attack Ofinaboorun’s…

Read More

If you have not seen the one-minute-30 seconds video of Lagosians scrambling for rice at the Nigeria Customs Service (NCS) facility, you must have read the news about the stampede that took place. Seven people died avoidably in that ugly incident foisted on us by bad leadership. I did not personally witness the Nigerian civil war. Archival family materials show that I was born the very day the General Yakubu Gowon government changed the police action against the Eastern Nigerian Government to a full-blown war. A child on his mother’s back does not have an idea of how long the…

Read More

An Ibadan man accompanied his wife and daughter to the market in search of salt to add to their tasteless pot of soup. That was in March 1881, when the city was besieged by hunger and war. It was a season of famine. The man who accompanied his wife and daughter to the market lost one of them right there, he became ‘wifeless’. What happened? His wife was bartered away to an Egba man by his daughter for a measure of salt! Yes! The daughter exchanged her mother for salt! That was the terrible situation Ibadan was at that time.…

Read More

The land of Samaria was once under intense hunger. There was hunger in the land, occasioned by a serious famine. The famine was caused by the siege laid on the city by another king, Beh-hadad, the king of Syria. The situation was such that cannibalism became the order of the day. Two women agreed to eat their sons. The first one, in her fidelity to the agreement, killed and boiled her son for supper. The duo ate the meal. When the time came for the second woman to also offer her son, she reneged. King Jehoram was passing by. He…

Read More

It is a sacrilege to say an oba is dead in Yorubaland. But two obas were killed by suspected kidnappers last week in Ekiti State. Their remains are on display everywhere on the Internet. The obas were three on that journey of fate, but one of them escaped by the grace of his God and of his ancestors, the ones who left the seat for him to sit. One of the killed obas, the Elesun of Esun Ekiti, Oba Babatunde Ogunsakin, was a maternal cousin to me. The second oba, the Olumojo of Imojo Ekiti, Oba Olatunde Olusola, came all…

Read More

In my place, we say one vegetable does not chase another out of the plate. South-South’s Edikang ikong soup is a practical illustration of that saying on inclusiveness. Has northern Nigeria ever heard of this other saying among the Yoruba?: Should Ogedengbe (Ijesha war General) be tending his ware of beads while Aduloju (Ado Ekiti war leader) is exhibiting his guns and bullets at same time? (Sé é ye kí Ògèdèngbé maà pa àte ìlèkè, kí Adúlójú maá pa àte ìbon ní Adó Èwí?). This caution speaks to war-baiting and the two warriors’ capacities to inflict maximum damages if war…

Read More

My sense of patriotism would not allow me to call Nigeria a failed nation. Yet, everything points in that direction. Governor Godwin Obaseki of Edo State warned as far back as March 2022 that a dollar would exchange for a thousand Naira. They called him names. What is the situation today? I asked Google this question: “What are the indices of a failed nation? This is the answer the search engine gave: “Common indicators include a state whose central government is so weak or ineffective that it has little practical control over much of its territory; non-provision of public services;…

Read More

A few years ago, the self-acclaimed ‘Living Perfect Master’, Sat Guru Maharaj Ji visited the Omo N’Oba N’Edo Uku Akpolokpolo, Oba of Benin, Oba Erediauwa, of blessed memory. The visitor arrived late. God bless Oba Erediauwa. He did not cancel the visit. After all, the palace goes nowhere, the people say. The monarch waited till Guru Maharaj Ji arrived. Palace functionaries went to inform the Omo N’Oba that his guest had arrived. A diplomat to the core, Oba Erediauwa came out of the inner recess to receive the visitor from Ibadan.  After the traditional formalities, Guru Maharaj Ji was asked…

Read More

By April, this year, the All Progressives Congress (APC) will hold its gubernatorial primary in Ondo State. Who says the new man Lucky Ayedatiwa can not lose the primary? If that happens, the entire APC political class will shift attention to the winner, and as a governor, Ayedatiwa will become a lame duck till he hands over later in the year. So, if I were the new Ondo State governor, I would not answer my name, Ayedatiwa, which gives one the false assurance that the world now belongs to one to own and to keep. But, if he decides to…

Read More

Two sad incidents provoked this piece. I encountered two funeral parties late last month – before the Omo N’Oba N’Edo Uku Akpolokpolo, Oba of Benin, Oba Ewuare II, stopped all funeral rites in Benin Kingdom because of the annual Igue Festival – that got me thinking. There are two big morgues on the Ekenwan axis of Benin City. On that road, especially every Thursday, it is hell for drivers and commuters alike. The ‘mourners’, who usually accompany the deceased’s family members to the morgues, are the most-unruly lots one can ever come across. They block the road both ways and…

Read More

I take a bet. The judgement of God and of the people is nigh! Check your neighbourhood. For weeks, and in some cases, months, there is no electricity. But in your houses, you run your generator. Neighbours come around to charge their phones, rechargeable lamps and what have you in your compound. How do you tell them that you are not part of the oppressors? What about water? As early as 5 am, neighbours are already on the queue in front of your house to fetch water. They don’t have the boldness to knock on your gate to wake you…

Read More

Gbelebu is a village in Ovia South-West Local Government Area of Edo State. It is a 100 percent Ijaw enclave. How such a community was delineated to be part of Edo, only God knows. Interestingly, the source of Gbelebu is Arogbo Ijaw in the present Ese-Odo Local Government Area of Ondo State. Gbelebu’s brothers are also scattered in Ovia North-East Local Government Area, also in Edo State and other Ijaw towns and villages in Delta and Bayelsa States. I was in that agrarian village last weekend for the funeral rites of High Chief Aaron Ponuwei Ebelo, the Okito of Gbaraun…

Read More

“A child”, the elders of my place say, “only knows when he takes the oath of loyalty but is never aware when he breaks it” (Ojó tí omodé bá mu ilẹ̀ lo mo; kii mo ojó tọ́ bá da). They did not stop there. They go a bit further to talk about the consequence of treachery. Their judgement is a grave one. They submit thus: “Ilẹ̀ ní pa òdàlẹ̀” (The earth kills the one who breaks an oath). Now listen. When you hear the word, “ilẹ̀”, my elders are not by any means referring to the solid surface known as…

Read More

“How many governors are in Oyo State?” The question was directed at me by an Abuja-based senior journalist. He is equally a friend. I was confused. Rather than answer, I put a call across to him. “Bros, what type of question is this?” He laughed. He told me that someone played the same prank on him, and he chose me as his own victim too. Then I understood what he was driving at. We discussed other issues, and I terminated the call. But ever since, the question has refused to go away. How many governors are indeed in Oyo State?…

Read More

I was just about five days old in Benin as the Edo State correspondent of the Nigerian Tribune when I thought I had run into a turbulence. I got a traditional summon. “You are the new correspondent of the Tribune?” Chief Nosakhare Isekhure, asked. I said Yes, sir. The old man was the Chief Priest of Benin Kingdom. He looked deep into me and continued: “I called you here to welcome you and to also encourage you. I read the story you did on Lucky Igbinedion and the teachers. That is how to work, and that is what the Tribune…

Read More

At the funeral service for late Chief Adekunle Ajasin on Saturday, November 15, 1997, this is what the late Primate of the Anglican Communion, Abiodun Adetiloye, said about Nigeria and its leaders. The fiery Anglican priest told those who gathered to honour the former governor of old Ondo State, at Saint Andrew’s Cathedral Anglican Church, Owo, venue of the funeral rites, why, despite the natural resources God blessed Nigeria with, the people live in abject poverty. In the congregation on that fateful day was the equally now late General Oladipo Diya, who was then the Second-in-Command to the expired tyrant,…

Read More

If I were President Bola Ahmed Tinubu, after the Thursday, October 26, 2023, affirmation of my election as the winner of the February 25, 2023, keenly contested and equally controversial presidential election, by the Supreme Court, I would call my diviners and offer them praises. I would call on Títírí lorí ogbo (the aged one). I would summon Bììrìpé lomi okòó dà (the water that drifts the canoe are both ways). I would ask Dídà lomi okòó dà, omi ókò kii yi (the water that drifts the canoe simply waves, it doesn’t overturn) to come in haste. I would remember…

Read More

Sheikh Ahmad Gumi called Mr. Nyesom Wike, Minister of the Federal Capital Territory (FCT) Abuja, “satanic”, last week. He could be right. Gumi is a Sheikh, and all Sheikhs are spiritual people. Some of them see the heart of God; at least they make us think so! He did not stop at that. He went ahead to ask Wike’s appointing authority, President Bola Ahmed Tinubu, to remove the former Rivers State governor as the Minister in charge of the FCT. He also did not stop at that. Gumi spoke like someone with authority. He does not issue ultimatums without spelling…

Read More

The food you give to a slave is not to make him grow fat, but for him not to die (Oñje tí a ñfún erú, ki i se ki o baa sanra, ki o ma baa kú ni)! That was the closing remarks of Òsúntúndé, a character in the Yoruba epic drama, “Efunsetan Aniwura”. Òsúntúndé, one of the male slaves of Efunsetan Aniwura, the Iyalode of Ibadan, gives this line while discussing the parlous conditions of the slaves in the household of Efunsetan. Most of our leaders are just like Efunsetan Aniwura, or even worse than the legendary Iyalode of…

Read More

There are people known in Yoruba worldview as Àkàndá (special beings). Everything about them is a mystery (Àdìtú). They get away with everything that would easily consume other mere mortals. Two of such men are from a state in the South-West of Nigeria. They are almost agemates, but perennial enemies. One is a retired soldier, and the other, an Alákòwé (a lettered man). Both had on many occasions in the past, survived the ‘bullets’ of the enemies – physical or metaphysical. There was also another man I knew, who died years back. He was the oldest in his village. He…

Read More

At 63 years of independence, Nigeria is either under the knife of a quack doctor, a certified but perfidious organ harvesting doctor, or a know-next-to-nothing illiterate who uses his or her brother’s certificate to organise a medicine store that doubles as drug exchange point! “Suyi, we are losing our humanity.” That was from an elderly fellow. It was a telephone call. I kept quiet at my own end. He continued: “I don’t know what to call this. We have gotten to a stage where we cannot trust our hospitals not to harvest our organs!” Still no response from me. Then…

Read More

May the Awujale of Ijebuland, Oba Sikiru Kayode Adetona, live long on the throne of his fathers. But, how about my illustrious Ijebu people having Fuji musician, Wasiu Ayinde, as their oba one day? That is what I see in the current drama of some Ijebu obas and others paying homage to him inside an ‘ipebi’ (seclusion). So, let me be the first outside Ijebuland to pay homage to the latest ‘oba’ in Yoruba land. Long live, Kabiyesi, Alayeluwa, Oba Wasiu Ayinde, the Olori Omooba Akile of Ijebuland. May you reign long on the throne of your forebears! Wasiu has…

Read More

At the installation of an oba in Yorubaland, he is given a list of taboos and red lines he must never cross. One of them is that he must never eat in public. I once attended a royal banquet in one of the palaces in the South-West, where I saw two foremost traditional rulers eat in public. The two of them are the biggest masquerades in the pantheon of natural rulers in the land. The host oba is also one of the most respected obas in Yorubaland with a deity-like figure. His oriki (panegyrics) says he is the òrìsà of…

Read More

Pray, how does a man tell his friends that his wife beat him the other day? How do men who suffer serious beatings in the hands of their wives in the day raise the wives’ skirts later at night to demand conjugal benevolence? Do such men get aroused anymore? Do they beg their wives to do what husbands and wives do? How do such men, for instance, come out of the house to go about their normal daily chores after the bashing from their women, knowing that their neighbours knew what happened? What about their children? Do those innocent souls…

Read More

I was away from the church on Sunday, September 3, 2023. When I came back, I was given an account of what happened. The teenagers’ class staged a playlet as part of activities for the September Thanksgiving Service. According to the report, the young boy who anchored the playlet asked the congregants to enjoy their presentation. In doing so, the boy used the language his generation understands. He was said to have asked “you guys” to enjoy the playlet. I was told the older generations in the church gave a sound that showed their disapproval of being called “guys” by…

Read More

The appointment of Hannatu Musawa as Minister of Art, Culture and Creative Economy by President Bola Ahmed Tinubu is the latest impunity and I-don-care-attitude any leader can display. Musawa has been in the eye of the storm in the last one week or so, when the news broke that the young minister is still a serving member of the National Youth Service Corps (NYSC), observing the mandatory one-year service to Nigeria as prescribed by the constitution and the NYSC Act. Since the news flew to town that the ‘Honourable’ minister still has some four months to go for her to…

Read More

“My friends all, like the sonorous proverb do we drum the agidigbo; it is the wise who dance to it, and the learned who understand its language.” These are the opening words of the apologue, “The Forest of a Thousand Daemons”, by Wole Soyinka. The weird novel itself is the English adaptation of D.O. Fagunwa’s “Ogboju Ode Ninu Igbo Irunmole”, which was first published in 1950. Agidigbo drum is one of the Yoruba’s surrogate instruments for language. Among such instruments with tonal peculiarities that can be translated to speeches are the talking drum (Gangan), Iya Ilu (Mother of all drums,…

Read More

Something is happening in Edo State right now. It is a big lesson in infidelity. As you read this piece, the rope which strapped Governor Godwin Obaseki and his deputy, Comrade Philip Shaibu, together in the wake of their joint political annihilation of their estranged godfather, Comrade Adams Oshiomhole, has snapped. As it stands today, Shaibu is holding on at the mercy of an Abuja Federal High Court, which asked the parties in the suit he filed to stay action. Shaibu, rightly, or wrongly, in the said suit, claimed that his principal, using the House of Assembly, had put in…

Read More

Nigerians Need Grains Not Bullets The Niger war has not started, but an iron wall has been cast across Africa. As I was writing this, the Daily Mail of the UK, and the Independent of the UK, said that the crisis in Niger had affected global aviation. On Monday, August 7, 2023, the newspapers reported that flights across Africa, Europe, and the Middle East experienced cancellations, delays, or diversions, traumatizing passengers and their families. In its headline, “British Airways forced to do a 10-hour ‘flight to nowhere’ as Niger suddenly closes airspace,” Independent UK reported that commercial aviation can’t operate…

Read More