Marriage is not a natural flow of events. It’s a ‘discipline’ and ‘price’ flow of events. The price could be indomie today but car tomorrow. It could be money today but attention tomorrow. Marriage is a flow against natural behaviour. Having a single partner is a learned trait. It is a trait hanging on discipline. The only reason people act in a disciplined fashion is because of the penalty or consequence associated with indiscipline. Discipline is either sustained with psychological fear (For instance, using God factor or conscience) or physical/legal enforcement of the laws or strong determination to succeed. Just…
Author: Azubuine Uche Nonso
EQUALITY will not solve the problem but EQUITY will do just that because even nature didn’t make man and woman equal especially in the home front. When I started talking about equity, many people including women who felt I was fighting them saw no reasons with me. Just this year, I got an email from access bank inviting customers for a seminar where they will talk about EQUITY. I smiled. Today, I wish to speak up on the issue of ‘submission’(a concept that has it’s long term connection to Apostle Paul’s writing in the Scripture) in marriage. Submission is yielding…
Many years back when social media and mobile phones were not rampant, people had less to compare their lives with. After school days, people scatter into the world like castor seeds in search of greener pastures and a peaceful life as the case may be. One may just have the opportunity of seeing few classmates again. On few occasions you may run into one, do little catching up and then move back to their normal lives. Nobody is logging into social media to see pictures of their classmates with their children to compare that they are not yet married or…
The reason why communities and families collect either a token or a huge amount before giving their daughters out in marriage has long been a confusing issue. While some say it’s symbolic without being able to say what it symbolizes, others have made attempt to describe the symbolic gesture as appreciation to the family of the lady. Another group which I happen to share in their sentiments describes the gesture as a ‘price to acquire’. In plain language, price is the cost of a commodity. Irrespective of how small or big, the symbolic gesture is the price to have a…
Many people will not marry! Many will not take up ‘professional’ career journeys. Many will not give birth(by choice). Many will not be parents by choice. Many will not remain spouses to others. Career, Child birth, spousal, parenting, etc, are huge responsibilities that not many will be willing to take up in pairs. Does it make anybody less of a responsible person for choosing to do just one ? No. There are many responsibilities to take up as an adult, from career, child birth, spousal, parenting… Identify your strength and focus on it especially if you feel you can’t handle…
Many people jump into business(es) because they heard or saw somebody who does the same thing making gains. They forget that every business has rules and secrets that you can never see as a by-stander. Everything looks simple and appealing as a by-stander. Again, People do not see the need to learn at all or even be patient enough to learn a trade or skill well before zooming off to start theirs. They overrate their smartness. Every business that you jump into without proper education or skill acquisition has a very high tendency of crashing or if you are lucky…
The hymen is like a security check point. When you get to the check point, you must slow down for a search. A woman is the gate keeper of s€x. She finds you worthy to walk through the gate, then you walk. Why did nature let women have such physical barricade but left men to be moving freely? Women are wired to be responsible beings. Nature already has given a clue that rascality is not compatible with their makeup. When you leave who you are and decide to become another, you must be torn apart first. Many women today have…
The belief in the presence and absence of God has been a life long debate and this is my truth. If one is taken to a well organized restaurant, where there are chefs and meals constantly made, just like we find trees bearing fruits and animals reproducing in this world…would anyone assume that nobody set up such restaurant ? We come into this world to meet humans, plants, other animals and natural non-living endowment. It is therefore, difficult to assume that these things just came to be. Even as humans, as basic as our understanding and experience are, things do…
From the reality on ground, it is likely that many couples do not think about death as part of the characteristics of man and its inevitability even among lovers/spouse. Many fail to consider that one of the spouse can die. One would ordinarily, shout God forbid, but we will all agree that reality is reality. Smart people only give birth to the number of Children that they can take care of and still have little fun filled life, if life happens. God forbid has never been able to forbid reality and death of loved ones. I have seen where one…
Women of my generation get worked up( especially with physical stress) because they want to meet up with men. They want to make equal, what shouldn’t be. Nature is the cheat ; the hormones, the muscle, physical strength, not Men. This is not me saying that women shouldn’t work but the natural constraints should be considered for a good balance and turbulence free feminine life. Moving against nature is so difficult, frustrating and aggression comes handy. Women are sweeter creatures and more sexually forthcoming when they are well rested and happy but men are more sexually forthcoming even under so…
Relationship/Marriage is a place that requires so much discipline and a great level of responsibility. Discipline that must be imbibed early enough in life because old habits are difficult to drop. Very difficult. I doubt if anybody who has lived so many years of adulthood on their terms actually enjoys staying with one person all their lives again. People who say that variety is the spice of life are speaking from the heart. Irresponsibility can be bliss. It is fun. No checks and balances. Staying faithful and happy with one person is another level of discipline that requires person’s who…
By Uche N. Azubuine So many people feel that ovulation is a process. Some even believe that the increase in temperature, slimy mucus secretion means they are ovulating. Ovulation is an event. It is that time in a woman’s cycle when a matured follicle has ruptured. There are times when a woman can have all the symptoms of ovulation but may in reality not ovulate. Let me start from the known to the unknown for this explanation. A normal female is born with two ovaries. Each month it is expected that the ovary will release one or more eggs(follicle)…
Written By Azubuine Uche Nonso on the occasion of 2022 International Women’s Day Celebration. Many women especially the feminist group in an attempt to achieve equality argue that women are marginalized when it comes to having a fair share of their Father’s property. This is to say, that they feel that their male counterparts in the family are treated better. How true is this claim ? The narrative that women are marginalized which has fueled so much bitterness in the minds of young women who may not have understood this equity based-inclusion structure put in place by the traditional forefathers…
