It is rather poignantly coincidental that on the day General Buhari marks his 80th birthday, it was revealed that Nigeria is now one of the top 4 debtors to the World Bank. We are the fourth most indebted nation. Only India, Pakistan and Bangladesh owe more than us.
In 2015, Nigeria was rich and Buhari was poor. In 2022, Buhari is rich and Nigeria is poor. I see no reason to wish the person who achieved such an extraordinary destiny transfer a happy birthday.
First of all, he has already made himself happy with our commonwealth. How much of our lean resources has he spent on his health as Nigeria’s number one health tourist to London, UK?
How much was spent on his son, Yusuf Buhari’s wedding last year? The price tag was reported to be in excess of $1 million dollars. More than 100 private jets landed in Kano. The couple made the front page of Europe’s Tatler Magazine under the title ‘Inside Nigeria’s ultra-glamorous royal wedding.’
And this is a man who had to take a loan to pay for his Presidential nomination form in 2015. Today, it is Nigerians who have to take loans just to feed.
So, why should I wish such a wastrel, and leprous fingered fellow a happy 80th birthday? A man who has brought much unhappiness to Nigeria, to the point where we became the world headquarters for extreme poverty under him, and our currency became one of the worst performing on Earth, moving from ₦190 to $1 in 2015 when he took over to ₦750 to $1 today?
The only thing I am eager to wish Buhari is bye bye on May 29, 2023. And he should not count on retiring to Daura in peace. He and Buratai must answer for the Lekki Massacre of peaceful, unarmed EndSARS protesters they killed on October 20, 2020, and the 347 men, women, children and infants they killed during the December 12, 2015 Zaria Massacre of Shiites, amongst other state sponsored killings.
Buhari must equally answer the following questions for Nigerians:
* What happened to Aisha Buhari’s ADC and the billions he stole?
* Why is Bola Tinubu not being charged despite clear evidence of bullion vans carrying money into his home on Election Day, in contravention of the Money Laundering Act, 2011?
* What happened to Nasir Danu, Buhari’s right hand man, who was arrested at London Heathrow Airport with undeclared huge sums of money and a fake passport?
* Who owns the Ikoyi Apartment billions?
* Why was Babachir Lawal acquitted despite clear evidence of theft?
* Where did Yusuf Buhari get money for his multimillion power bike?
* Why was NNPC’s $25 billion contract awarded without due process (from the leaked memo of the former Minister of State for Petroleum) never investigated?
* Why was his daughter made a manager at an NNPC subsidiary?
* How come Nigeria’s foreign debt increased from $7 billion in 2015 to $42 billion today, with little to show for it?
* Why did you Buhari seek a $500 million loan to digitalise NTA and improve media?
These 10 questions are my birthday present to a bloodthirsty tyrant, who met a prospering country and brought it to its knees economically. May you and the All Progressives Congress go on May 29, 2023 and NEVER return.
Reno Omokri
Gospeller. Deep Thinker. #BuhariTormentor. #TableShaker. Ruffler of the Feathers of Obidents. #1 Bestselling author of Facts Versus Fiction: The True Story of the Jonathan Years. Hodophile. Hollywood Magazine Humanitarian of the Year, 2019. Business Insider Influencer of the Year 2022.
